Abe - The perfect Bachelor

Benny, the matchmaker, goes to see Abe, a confirmed bachelor for many years.

"Abe, you mustn't wait too long. I have exactly the one you need. You only have to say the word and you'll meet and be married in no time!" says Benny.

"Don't bother," replies Abe, "I've two sisters at home, who look after all my needs."

"That's all well and good," said Benny, "but all the sisters in the world cannot fill the role of a wife."

"I said 'two sisters'. I didn't say they were mine!"

Banta's Marriage Advice

Banta preaches, "Don’t marry a beautiful person. They may leave you. "

Of course, an ugly person may leave you too, but then who cares?

Punjabi Dog

Banta walks into a Dhaba with a dog.

The owner comes up to him and says, "Pardon me, you can't bring your dog in here as others will feel uncomfortable."

"What do you mean," says Banta, "this is a Punjabi dog and knows our tradition. Look."

"DalJeet," says the Banta, "Show you are Punjabi" !!

"Woof!" says the dog, stands on his hind legs, opens his bag (which was hanging with his neck), takes out a turban and puts it on his head.

"Woof!" says the dog, stands on his hind legs, opens bag again, takes out a sword and displays his swords skills.

"That's fantastic," says the owner, "absolutely amazing, incredible! You should take him to Hollywood, get him on television, get him in the movies, he could make a million dollars!!"

"Please, You speak to him and make him understand," says Banta, "he wants to be a dentist."

Banta stole priest's golden watch

Banta has stolen the priest's gold watch from gurudwara.

He didn't feel too good about it, so he decided, after a sleepless night

to go to the priest.

'Sir, I stole a gold watch.', regretted Banta.

'But Banta ! That's forbidden! You should return it immediately !'

'What shall I do ?' . asks Banta

'Give it back to the owner.', concluded Priest

'Do you want it ?' , quipped Banta

'No, I said return it to its owner.', replied Priest

'But he doesn't want it.', replied Banta

'In that case, you can keep it.' concluded Priest.